In the spirit of student blogging...

Here is a list of tasty dishes that I could make out of the food currently present in my cupboard:

Cocopops and choc-hazelnut spread sandwiches. As long as I use cheese slices instead of bread.

Leftover cous cous and wilted (from being in the fridge too long, not on purpose) spinach and salmon slices salad. (Okay, that one actually sounds almost nice.)

Umm..... oh, wait... I could have fish fingers.

Well, that's not really a dish, there's only one component.

I could however have one wikid fruit salad, with choc-hazelnut spread, tinned fruit, frozen berries and cocopops....

....


...


...

hmmm.

m

A shrinky dinky dinky...a shrinky dinky doo...

So lots of things sort of tiddling (Yes, I know that's a shit word.) through my head right now, after my trip to the shrink. Yes, in case you don't know, I see a shrink once a week. Mostly for being bipolar, but if you believe my shrink, also for issues relating to my (physically) distant father and my emotionally unavailable mother. Yes, my shrink has the entire collected works of Freud in his office.

Anyway, I usually have lots to think about after the shrink, and instead of rambling I am going to make a nice list:

1) Is it normal to feel uncomfortable/kinda creeped out talking to my shrink?
2) Do I really fall for people specifically because they are emotionally unavailable to me?
3) Do I really believe all this Freud bullshit anyway?
4) Is it really a warning sign of something bad that Gray picks me up on it when I use incorrect English? My shrink thinks so, but while it annoyed me, I asked Gray about it and he reckoned it was just a defence mechanism he uses when he's intimidated. Hmm, *shrug* dunno.
5) Do I maybe want a different shrink, because I disagree a lot with this one and also he creeps me out- when he says that he wants me to be able to lean on him (emotionally) my brain just says 'hellls noooooo'?

Okay, so some of those weren't quite questions. Eh, who cares.

Here's another nice list, in the theme of the post, entitled:

Songs That Have Dragged Me Through Some Tough Times

1. Matisyahu- King Without A Crown (live, the one on the album is shite)
2. Matisyahu - Lord Raise Me Up (In case you were wondering, no, I am not even slightly religious.)
3. Ben Harper - Better Way
4. Butterfingers - Get Up Outta The Dirt
5. The Grates- Trampoline (whee bouncy!)

Okay... I am going to go bounce around the house to silly happy music now...

Oh, and in case you were wondering- I'm going to call Gray tonight to ask for another date. Wish me luck!

m

Bunny is Funny

Stolen from the wonderful Bunny.

In other news...

I had my phone appointment with Centrelink this morning, and actually got a nice, helpful Centrelink person on the phone. (I know, I'm surprised too!)

I had an awesome dream about cakes. Lovely cakes. Oooh I love a bit o' cake. (Actually I generally don't, but I couldn't resist the quote.)

I am getting a cold. This infuriates me, I only hope that it's not the cold one of my friends has, which has been around for weeks. I had a cold for six weeks just before I broke up with the ex, that was BAD ENOUGH. No more this year ok?

Lots of gigs on this weekend- I only hope I am not too poor to go to them all.

Also, I was infuriated to discover, when I got my playstation out ready for a mind-numbing holiday filled with Playstation, that my Final Fantasy 7 discs are GONE. I was well pissed- I loaned my Playstation to my step brother, I can only imagine that's where they are- along with my dual shock controller and my memory card. (Although I have a new memory card now, so that bit's okay.)

Okay, pointless update of blog- done.

Back to the crossword.

m

Ahhh feck...

*sigh*

m

Oh oh...I was in the middle of vacuuming the house, in preparation for mopping, cleaning the bathroom and then my room. But I seem to have...sat down at the computer.

Bad sign.

Stupid laziness.

m

Hello world!

I'd just like to say that I'm rather frightfully awake. Hello!

(I knew I shouldn't have gotten up to turn the aircon on. If only I'd lay in bed for just that little bit longer I might be asleep by now.)

Oh well. Third time lucky. Off I go!

m

Bank account says....no....

So my plans to get royally sloshed last night were somewhat hindered by the fact that I only had 20 bucks to my name. I am a persistent wee critter, however, and I did my best by employing two age old student tricks- not eating dinner, and then having pre drinks at home. My pre-drinks were, of course, Double Blacks- god's gift to small poor drinkers.

The night was punctuated by Gray related thoughts and actions. I missed the first two support acts at the gig because I was hanging out with him. It was pretty busy (damn Saturday nights!) so we didn't get to chat much but I enjoyed (for the most part) watching him be bartender man- throwing glasses around and making Jaegerbombs and the like. I got mildly jealous of course- girls were flirting with him (who wouldn't?!) but mostly I was sensible. We hung out on his break, I somehow ended up lighting his cigarettes for him. I'm going to blame that on me loving the Zippo, but it kinda illustrates that I must like him at least a little bit to not have even thought of giving him shit for smoking.

I was quite tipsy by then, my memory is a little foggy, but we ended up making out on the steps in the middle of the mall. It was great- the kissing itself was lovely, and I was just drunk enough that the room spun (span?) when I closed my eyes, making it even more fun. I was completely not interested in talking to or even noticing other people at the time. To illustrate- not only did I brush off one of my friends, basically told a random to 'bugger off', but also apparently I saw one of The Veronicas while I was sitting in the mall talking to Gray, and I just couldn't care less. (Although I'm not sure if I would really care, even without him being there. I don't like The Veronicas.)

I am worried about seeming too keen (I am pretty keen though, and it's unusual for me so I'm wallowing in it, ok?) given that I hung out with him for two whole sets, lit his cigarettes and kissed him even though he'd just been smoking. I can't help myself- when we came back to visit after the gig, I got my water and then said I was leaving- he leaned across the bar towards me, pointed to his cheek and grinned. I of course, gave him a kiss. It was lovely and cheeky and hawt!

I keep having little flashes of him right now, it's intense but excellent. His smell especially. At one point he tilted his chin up and pressed my face into his neck, so I could smell him, it made me melt. The look on his face when he beckoned me with his fingers before we went out for his break, all sorts of little things.

I'm being patient though- I think I laid my cards on the table a little too early with all the stuff yesterday maybe, so I'm backing off a bit- I'll let him message me, despite the intense urge to contact him.

m

Sorry if this post is completely incoherent- I'm feeling incredibly sleepy and dazed right now. It's quite surreal.

A Query

There's a post in the works about my night out last night, and my encounter with Gray. I'm just being funny about posting it, if anyone was wondering.

What I was wondering was if anyone has heard a track from The Knife's album, Deep Cuts, called 'Behind the Bushes'. If you have, could you please lord tell me what the tune is from?

I think it might be from a computer/console game, maybe Final Fantasy, but it's driving me MAD not knowing.

m

Contrariness- # 532

I have two varieties of puffed rice cereal to choose between for breakfast (Cocopops or Kellogg's Ricies) and I, naturally, don't want either.

Gah!


Other weirdness:

I always crave milk when I've been drinking. I think it's to do with the fact that I didn't like water in my childhood, so milk was basically my anti-dehydration measure. I just had my second chocolate milk since I got home from out, and it was excellent. When dehydrated I also dream about drinking lots of fluid- usually gatorade or milk, but that's all I'm doing in the dream- no lead up, no weird randomness like other dreams- JUST DRINKING. My sub-concious is about as subtle as the rest of me, non?


m

Just so's you know...

He messaged me yesterday arvo. Apparently he got the message I sent while he was at work, couldn't reply for the next five hours, then forgot about it.

Rude boy. Should I be offended?

m

Vacillating...

once had to spell that in a spelling bee when I was young. I came second, because I got it wrong and the other kid's word was 'leopard'. I know, I WAS ROBBED. Anyway, this post has a point, and here it is.

My confidence/security that yes, Gray does in fact like me is now vacillating- I texted to ask where/when the second date would be at 8pm Wednesday night (after he told me he'd be keen for another one) and I still haven't had a response. That's more than 24 hours people! I am not feeling the love! (lust/like, whatever)

Yes yes, I know, make allowances for him working at a bar, he was probably at work when I texted, and then recovering from work (read: sleeping), but still. Text messages make people have no manners, and it's bad for my poor little ego.

In other news, I had an awesome James Bond style dream where I was a sexy bird running around in high heels (I can't walk in heels, let alone run) and a red dress, saving my friends and the world from impending doom. Hot!

m

Craptastic to be continued...(or whatever I called that post down there.)

Okay, so I promised you the funniest first date story ever.

So maybe that was hyperbole, but it seemed hilarious at 8 am this morning after no sleep. So we'll see.


My Own Idiocy - Phase 1, 8 pm Tuesday 21st

I'm at home, 8 pm Tuesday night, eating dinner and prepping for a movie night with a housemate and my bestie. Bestie is eagerly reading through text messages from the latest boy in my life, with whom I have a date planned for Wednesday night.

My phone makes that happy little text message noise, and Bestie passes the phone to me.

The message is from the boy, we'll call him Gray. It reads:

"Heya, is your arrival imminent? ;)"

*cue intense rush of horror and confusion, frantic checking of text messages arranging the date, and then freaking out*

"Shit shit shit!" I say. Housemate + friend, curious, look at me.

"What's wrong?"

"I am supposed to be on a date with Gray, right now."

Bestie: *hysterical laughter* "Oh. That's a problem then."

Turns out I had my wires crossed, the date was planned for Tuesday, not Wednesday, as Gray works Wednesday night.

*cue frantic phone call, intense mortification and apologies*

The date is rescheduled for an hour's time (the joy of living close) and I make like a chicken trying to get ready. (Anyone familiar with female first date preparations will know that having less than an hour to get ready is a little ambitious- I was COMPLETELY UNPREPARED.)

Anyway, date was excellent, we closed a few bars, ended up on the couch at my house chatting until 8 am.

Eeep! - Phase 2, 8 am Wednesday 22nd


Boy and I are chatting on the couch. Bestie wakes up, wanders out, says good morning, wanders into the bathroom. Gray goes outside for a cigarette.

Bestie comes back, look of dismay on his little face, and says:

"Um, you may not want to use the bathroom anytime soon."

I give him a oh-my-god-did-you-just-stink-up-my-bathroom look.

"Not me and worse than you think." he says.

Naturally I can't help but investigate, and to my horror, in my toilet, is the BIGGEST POO IN THE WHOLE GODDAMNED WORLD.

*cue intense horror, frantic unsuccessful attempts to flush said poo*

Normally I wouldn't be too bothered- poo is icky, true, but you know, natural. However I c an't cope with it being poo of hot boy that I have just had a lovely first date with. That is wrong. Hot nice boys don't do giant unflushable turds in my toilet!

*cue frantic MSN conversation with Housemate-In-America re poo removal*

Finally after much fuss, poo is gone (drop lots of paper on top, then use both flushes, several times. GONE!) and all is well in the world again.

So that's the story.

Despite terrible poo related dramas, I am still eager for another date. So's he, it seems.

Yay!

m

Image pinched from Alvorada.

Literally...craptastic...

Oh my lord, funniest first date story ever.

More later, after some sleep, I have not been to bed yet. (Yes, it was a good as well as hilariously mis-managed date.)

m

TV Based Idiocy

Today, on Today Tonight: Tests unfairly advantage children who are BETTER PREPARED for them through tutoring. *cue shock and horror*

Tommorrow, on Current Affair: Icebergs are big. And pretty. And cold.

Guh.

m

Putting on my geek panties for a moment...

Check out this video of the Hubble Deep Field- pinched from Dating Dummy and Youtube, it's awesome!

m

Love and Hate Tuesday

Love: Damien Rice's fantastic cover of 'When Doves Cry' on Triple J's Like a Version CD. You must get this!

Hate: Centrelink. See below.



Dear Centrestink,

I know that I don't fit in your tight little box, with my apparently hugely complex academic arrangements. Which, while irritating, is something I can deal with However, I've been having a pretty shit time this semester, what with being diagnosed with Bipolar II and trying to get my psychiatric shit together, so I had to withdraw from uni.

This, as you'd understand, was pretty stressful- I am pretty dissappointed that I couldn't complete the semester, and am feeling generally stressed and not too impressed with myself about the whole failing and the being a crazy person thing.

Consequently, when I recieved a phone call from you guys today, telling me that because I withdrew, I can't get Youth Allowance over the holidays, even though I am going back to uni next semester just like everyone else, I was, understandably more than a little bit pissed.

To make matters worse, you want me to go onto Newstart allowance, which is weird, since as far as my university is concerned, I'm still a fulltime student, and as far as my job is concerned, I am definitely not a jobseeker. Newstart also won't pay me for the three weeks I'm in New Zealand, which kind of fucks up that whole "rent" thing I'm doing. I know I know, your hands are tied by rules and regs, I understand that. However, I have to say, I don't give a shit, and while your hands are tied I'd like to take the opportunity to take hold of them, bend you over, and jam a very large pineapple in that tight little box of yours. Okay?

/end rant

m

Example of why this blog is called what it is: Number 468

So I spent like 5 bucks on a tiny box of Coco Pops yesterday because I was completely sick of toast, and anyway, we are out of bread.

Naturally, right now, I have the biggest craving for Vegemite on toast.

*headdesk*

moi

Craptacular...

Reading this list over at Expat@Large made me laugh, and gave me "happy" nostalgia about my travels, particularly to Asia. Particularly my week long exchange to a school in China, where the toilet stalls didn't have doors. For some reason this horrified me much more than the ever-present squat toilets, especially when escorted to the loo by an eager student, who then proceeded to wait outside the toilet I planned to use.

I also completely relate to the preoccupation with bathroom/toilet facilities- after travelling through Asia, particularly if not staying in Western hotels, when I arrive home (or even at my home airport) it's all I can do not to lay on the floor in the bathroom stroking and kissing its glistening tiled surface. (Let's not even get started on what I'd do to the loo.)

At the other end of the bog scale, is the Frederick Hundertwasser toilet in Kawakawa, in New Zealand. Because I know you all like something to look at, here is a photo we took of it in our travels.



moi

PS. Forgive the crappy picture quality- it was 2002, after all!