Some lame post title...

I dreamed about the ex last night. The most recent one. Not the one I've been hanging out with. (I should develop nicknames for these guys or something.)

Nothing too exciting, just us at a house somewhere, watching tv with a couple of people, me curled up with my head in his lap, my hands wrapped around his arm occasionally or his thigh, it was just really nice and felt great, it made me smile. Very sappy and out of character for me, I know.

There was some random dream weirdness where he had a great rotting wound on his foot, but I got over it pretty quickly. Also out of character!

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More emo shite...

So I'm in some kind of weird emo-fugue. I am cranky with everyone about everything- best mate just moved to Melbourne, and spent his last day in Brisbane with a girl he claims not to like that much but is sleeping with, rather than his best friend. Former best friend has been avoiding text and calls and seems to like moving to Melbourne best friend better.

Put on 10 kilos, thanks to lithium and eating without thinking, woot. I find solace in shopping and sleeping wherever possible, even though sleeping in the afternoon makes me cranky for the rest of the night.

You'll all be pleased to know I did not sleep with the ex, and have decided not to, though he is still around. We are trying to be friends, which is hard work because he's incredibly high maintenance, and I don't do high maintenance friends. I wonder why I bother sometimes, because it's exhausting, but we have fun together and I think once he gets his mental shit together things will be easier.

I've also had a massive inferiority complex for some reason lately- feeling inferior to my friends, to the trendy dressed people at gigs, feeling left out and insecure.

*sigh*

I am regressing back to highschool!

Bed now,

bye kids