Check it out- I cried!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Some lame post title...
I dreamed about the ex last night. The most recent one. Not the one I've been hanging out with. (I should develop nicknames for these guys or something.)
Nothing too exciting, just us at a house somewhere, watching tv with a couple of people, me curled up with my head in his lap, my hands wrapped around his arm occasionally or his thigh, it was just really nice and felt great, it made me smile. Very sappy and out of character for me, I know.
There was some random dream weirdness where he had a great rotting wound on his foot, but I got over it pretty quickly. Also out of character!
m
Nothing too exciting, just us at a house somewhere, watching tv with a couple of people, me curled up with my head in his lap, my hands wrapped around his arm occasionally or his thigh, it was just really nice and felt great, it made me smile. Very sappy and out of character for me, I know.
There was some random dream weirdness where he had a great rotting wound on his foot, but I got over it pretty quickly. Also out of character!
m
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
More emo shite...
So I'm in some kind of weird emo-fugue. I am cranky with everyone about everything- best mate just moved to Melbourne, and spent his last day in Brisbane with a girl he claims not to like that much but is sleeping with, rather than his best friend. Former best friend has been avoiding text and calls and seems to like moving to Melbourne best friend better.
Put on 10 kilos, thanks to lithium and eating without thinking, woot. I find solace in shopping and sleeping wherever possible, even though sleeping in the afternoon makes me cranky for the rest of the night.
You'll all be pleased to know I did not sleep with the ex, and have decided not to, though he is still around. We are trying to be friends, which is hard work because he's incredibly high maintenance, and I don't do high maintenance friends. I wonder why I bother sometimes, because it's exhausting, but we have fun together and I think once he gets his mental shit together things will be easier.
I've also had a massive inferiority complex for some reason lately- feeling inferior to my friends, to the trendy dressed people at gigs, feeling left out and insecure.
*sigh*
I am regressing back to highschool!
Bed now,
bye kids
Put on 10 kilos, thanks to lithium and eating without thinking, woot. I find solace in shopping and sleeping wherever possible, even though sleeping in the afternoon makes me cranky for the rest of the night.
You'll all be pleased to know I did not sleep with the ex, and have decided not to, though he is still around. We are trying to be friends, which is hard work because he's incredibly high maintenance, and I don't do high maintenance friends. I wonder why I bother sometimes, because it's exhausting, but we have fun together and I think once he gets his mental shit together things will be easier.
I've also had a massive inferiority complex for some reason lately- feeling inferior to my friends, to the trendy dressed people at gigs, feeling left out and insecure.
*sigh*
I am regressing back to highschool!
Bed now,
bye kids
Monday, May 28, 2007
Contrary + one million
So, I have a dilemma. (Pablo, you may want to skip this one, so you don't get the urge to kill me.)
Okay, so there's this ex I have, right. Not the most recent one. It's the one who's bed I woke up in a few weekends ago, though that time we just spooned, it was all (relatively) innocent.
Our relationship was always a bit complicated- I only ever really wanted casual sex from him, and he wanted more from me; at the time I didn't really know how to say no to his wanting more, and it bothered me a lot. I actually reached the point where I refused to hang out with him because the chemistry was too insane- I had zero chance of being friends with him without fooling around with him.
Now, a few years on, we've both been through some different things, and while the first time round fucked me up a lot, I am considering sleeping with him again. Does this make me an idiot? He says he's not interested in getting back together, and I just want sex, so what do you reckon? I really need some help!
Okay, so there's this ex I have, right. Not the most recent one. It's the one who's bed I woke up in a few weekends ago, though that time we just spooned, it was all (relatively) innocent.
Our relationship was always a bit complicated- I only ever really wanted casual sex from him, and he wanted more from me; at the time I didn't really know how to say no to his wanting more, and it bothered me a lot. I actually reached the point where I refused to hang out with him because the chemistry was too insane- I had zero chance of being friends with him without fooling around with him.
Now, a few years on, we've both been through some different things, and while the first time round fucked me up a lot, I am considering sleeping with him again. Does this make me an idiot? He says he's not interested in getting back together, and I just want sex, so what do you reckon? I really need some help!
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Ooops...
I am a terrible terrible drunkard. So, work boy had arranged to come round last night, because he was going to be in the neighbourhood, finishing a group assignment. I however got invited out to the Regatta for free drinkies, which is understandably difficult to pass up. I initially planned to not drink, because I drove the car and would need to get home to see work boy. However, some evil people started waving free champagne right under my nose, and I couldn't resist. So I texted work boy asking if he could come get us. No response for ages, so I just got hammered instead.
Several hours later I texted him to find out what was happening, and he said he would come get us. He did, I was hammered by this point, we oh so nicely requested that he drive our friend home to Auchenflower also, and then us.
So we get home, cuddle and shit, go to bed, and I am extremely drunk by this point. The chemistry is still not great, even with the help of the booze. Oh noes! Then I feel the need to go and throw up, and he doesn't even look after me while I'm doing it! Bitch! Then I go back to bed, we make out, he gets really pushy for action "Just kiss it! Just kiss it!" and I'm not really that into it, being chemistry-less and hammered. So, and my memory gets a little fuzzy here, he leaves. Not quite sure what the conversation about him leaving was, and I didn't see him to the door. Oops!
I have to go to work now, I hope it's not too awkward!
What do you think?
m
Several hours later I texted him to find out what was happening, and he said he would come get us. He did, I was hammered by this point, we oh so nicely requested that he drive our friend home to Auchenflower also, and then us.
So we get home, cuddle and shit, go to bed, and I am extremely drunk by this point. The chemistry is still not great, even with the help of the booze. Oh noes! Then I feel the need to go and throw up, and he doesn't even look after me while I'm doing it! Bitch! Then I go back to bed, we make out, he gets really pushy for action "Just kiss it! Just kiss it!" and I'm not really that into it, being chemistry-less and hammered. So, and my memory gets a little fuzzy here, he leaves. Not quite sure what the conversation about him leaving was, and I didn't see him to the door. Oops!
I have to go to work now, I hope it's not too awkward!
What do you think?
m
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Friday, May 18, 2007
Freud would have loved me...
I had the best crazy dreams last night!
The first one was my favourite, in it I was in love with this super hot jock guy (pretty much a replica of the guy who rejected me at the party on Saturday, boo hoo) and he was just as infatuated. Admittedly I think even my dream in love ness was due to regular and thorough shaggings, but what can you do! Everyone else in my dream hated him, because he was a 'big dumb jock' but I was deliriously happy- see Shrink, I can do it, even if only in my dreams!
Then he dissappeared from my dream and I was very sad, spent the next four dreams looking for him. So lame, but so me!
Anyway, the dirt is in the other dreams. Along with some wacky 'dodgeball on a massive scale' dreams, in one of these little scenarios, I had a threesome- with two of my exes- the bad one, and another one I'm still in contact with, and one of them was dominating us both! Weird.
I wonder what it all means? Any thoughts?
The first one was my favourite, in it I was in love with this super hot jock guy (pretty much a replica of the guy who rejected me at the party on Saturday, boo hoo) and he was just as infatuated. Admittedly I think even my dream in love ness was due to regular and thorough shaggings, but what can you do! Everyone else in my dream hated him, because he was a 'big dumb jock' but I was deliriously happy- see Shrink, I can do it, even if only in my dreams!
Then he dissappeared from my dream and I was very sad, spent the next four dreams looking for him. So lame, but so me!
Anyway, the dirt is in the other dreams. Along with some wacky 'dodgeball on a massive scale' dreams, in one of these little scenarios, I had a threesome- with two of my exes- the bad one, and another one I'm still in contact with, and one of them was dominating us both! Weird.
I wonder what it all means? Any thoughts?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
